Planning Your Aims… Becoming Lighter Series – (2)

So continuing with the Becoming Lighter series, if you want to read my thoughts on this subject don’t forget to follow and thank you for reading my blog. Check out previous posts too!

We have brainstormed aims and eliminated some aims and decided what goals or aims we intend to implement. Focus on one aim at a time and break it down into smaller elements. ┬áThis enables what psychologists call “implementation intentions”. Also, it is a good idea to find value in each task.

For example, I’ve decided to write my blog after having the late afternoon cuppa. I’ve attached the task to having a cup of tea and a possible snack during the late or early part of the evening. Mark Manson mentions habits in his paper (as below) and writes about how psychologists indicate that willpower can be trained like a muscle as it is about integrating good habits into daily life. Personally, I find it helps to combine it with something you want to do at a specific time of the day. This can help habit formation. Doesn’t always work because life gets in the way, but most days a cuppa (habit) and blog writing or researching (new habit) is beginning to happen. Same with visiting the gym. Which for me, is best done before work, if I can face getting out of bed, or straight after work, before I return home, eat and chill out.

To sum up…

– Focus on one aim

– Break it down into sub aims

– Form a new aim with your usual routine (new habit/old habit)

– Be positive

– Source: Mark Manson’s paper ‘The Guide to Habits’ (download if put ‘habits’ in search on this site)

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Setting New Life Aims – Becoming Lighter (1)

Discussing your happy life is so ubiquitous it becomes a bit pointless. What we really need to do, is analyse what we want to aim for, how, when and where in order to arrive at “the happy life”.

For this reason, I am starting this blog series with meeting aims. Most people may call them resolutions or goals and set them at the beginning of the year. By February, the majority have rescinded their resolutions and probably even forgotten them. However, if you call them aims, they become an ongoing process and enjoyed and improved upon.

Mark Manson wrote an article called The Most Important Question of Your Life. He asks how much pain do you want in your life? This pertains to the idea that you need to encounter negativity and experience a struggle. What you get out of life is not determined by good feelings and desire, but derived from bad feelings you are able to sustain. Therefore, if you are good at negative experiences then you are good at dealing with life. Are you good at dealing with negativity? No, like most of us, probably not.

We all are good imagining ourselves as skinny peeps, living in gloriously immaculate homes and eating copious amounts of fresh fruit and vegetables, but it isn’t that simple. Not in my world. Clearly how you define negativity, defines us.

If you want “the happy life” you have to determine what you really want. So listing goals can be helpful, but it is then better, in my humble opinion, to pick two and decide the route you are going to take. Therefore eliminate the goals and pursue two or three aims.

After you’ve narrowed down the ideas, start to break them down into a format that you are able to cope with. For example, last year I decided to start a blog. An arduous task because I was busy with lots of family stuff, etc. I broke it down and picked a blog site, chose a name, then started writing in the hope that somebody might read it! Still hoping, but there has been some good feedback and I enjoy it so what the hell! This year, am trying to write more intentionally and endeavour to make content my main aim.

To sum up…

– Brainstorm this year’s aims (family, job, travel, education, social life, hobbies, home)

– Pick the top two aims and focus

– Ask yourself if you are committed to the aim

– Break them down so they are not so daunting

Good luck and in a few day will post my pearls of wisdom about planning aims. Look forward to seeing you then.

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